Why Women Mentors are Important

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The Importance of Women as Mentors in Our Lives

by Angelica Perez on May 31, 2010

The following is a guest post from Angelica Perez-Litwin of Modern Familia.

There are mothers and sisters and good friends and teachers. And then, there are mentors…

Along the curves and bumps in my life journey, I have been fortunate to have mentors to steer me in the right direction, to get me back on track and to cheer me on at the finish line. Most of them have been women — inspirational, wise and strong women.

They have appeared in my life like a blessing, just at the right time and with purpose. I have met them in college, in graduate school, at work, online, in my community and within my family. They have served as powerful role models, anchors, life coaches, motivators and firm reminders of who I am and what I can become.

Mentor as Wise Advisers

Traditionally, a mentor is known as a wise and trusted adviser, teacher or friend, who is usually a more experienced person than the mentee in a particular community or role. Mentoring relationships normally exist in corporate environments and in higher education settings, where mentors help individuals advance in their careers, enhance their education, and build networks.

Mentors in the Business of Life

I propose we broaden the concept of mentorship to include the invaluable role that women serve to each other, as powerful sources of inspiration, guidance, support and encouragement.

Undeniably, men can be great mentors too, but it is the commonality of womanhood that makes women true life mentors. Consider the friend(s) you called upon as a new mother full of questions and doubts. Or the women you reached out to when life was unkind. Think about your go-to person when you need inspiration to balance it all and continue to move forward. And what about the wise women you look up to because they’ve been there and done that – successfully and confidently? These women, I say, are life mentors.

Photo by J.Cliss

Are You a Life Mentor to Someone Else?

You may not be aware of it, but you also have the opportunity to be a life mentor to someone else! Consider the following common characteristics of life mentors and how they might describe you as well:

• They have experienced and conquered challenging moments in their lives, which have made them a wiser person
• They readily use their own personal experiences to instill hope and share life strategies
• They are resilient, positive and open-minded
• They enjoy empowering others and bringing out their best
• They are supportive and are able to put aside their interest, for the sake of others in need of help and guidance

Why Do We Need Women as Mentors?

Women today are busier than ever. As working parents, we work long hours or hold multiple jobs. As stay-at-home moms, we take care of active and busy children while managing our homes and sometimes even working from home. We are creating new possibilities, starting or running businesses and pursuing our dreams.

Today, we need each other more than ever. Traditional support systems, such as extended family members, are less available to provide support due to their own busy schedules or distant living. So in these modern times, we need our small community of women mentors, to embrace us and empower us.

Photo by Ben Dodson

Where to Seek Life Mentors

By now, you might be wondering how you can sign up for one of these! The truth is, life mentors are all around us. We may not see them in this way, as potential life mentors, but they are among our social circle. Here are a few places to begin your search:

• among close, supportive friends
• among co-worker or colleagues
• extended family members
• people in your community (women’s groups, places of worship, other parents at school)
• former or current teachers and professors
• professional life coaches and counselors
• mentoring network websites (Mommy Mentors, HerFuture, Mentor)

You can also form your own group of life mentors interested in mutually mentoring each other. You can hold monthly meetings or do so completely virtually (online).

If there is someone in your life that could serve as a life mentor, try to connect to her, and don’t hesitate to ask for guidance. You will know you have connected when you find yourself feeling good about yourself and feeling deep admiration and trust for this person after a meaningful conversation.

It might take a village to raise a child, but it certainly takes a small community of life mentors to help women transform and reach their full God-given potential in life.

Bread

Bread is symbolic throughout Scriptures.

Throughout our day, every time we see bread we should be reminded of at least 4 different things.

1. Obedience

• Exodus 12:39 And they baked unleavened cakes of the dough that they had brought out of Egypt, for it was not leavened, because they were thrust out of Egypt and could not wait, nor had they prepared any provisions for themselves.

• The unleavened bread symbolized the need to obey quickly. They didn’t have time to wait for obedience. The Israelites needed to pick up and go quickly. We are the same way. We need to be ready and willing to obey quickly. Delayed obedience is disobedience.

2. Relationship with a holy God

• Exodus 25:30 And you shall set the bread of the Presence on the table before me regularly.

• The bread was set in the Holies of Holies in the Temple to show the covenant between God and his people. God continues to be in relationship with his children today.

3. We need more than just our physical needs met

• Deuteronomy 8:3 And he humbled you and let you hunger and fed you with manna, which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that he might make you know that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord.

• Isaiah 55:2-3 Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy? Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food. Incline your ear, and come to me; hear, that your soul may live;

• John 6:32-33 Jesus then said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, it was not Moses who gave you the bread from heaven, but my Father gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”

• We are not helping our mentee by simply giving her worldly wisdom and our advice. We need to be pointing her continually back to Christ so that she could truly be satisfied. She will not be filled on your words alone.

4. Christ is our Bread of Life

• John 6:35;48-51 Jesus said to them, “I am the bread of life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst. I am the bread of life. Your fathers ate the manna in the wilderness, and they died. This is the bread that comes down from heaven, so that one may eat of it and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. And the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.”

• Matthew 26:26 Now as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and after blessing it broke it and gave it to the disciples, and said, “Take, eat; this is my body.”Christ is always the answer. Whatever we are going through, whatever we are needing, we also need more of Christ. Today, eat some bread and remember that Jesus truly is the bread of LIFE

Mentoring Roles

While reading on various websites recently, I found an article which profiled the book Spiritual Mentoring: A Guide for Seeking and Giving Direction. I personally found the information in the profile very helpful, so thought I would excerpt some of it for you as well. As the profile was quite long, I have split the excerpts into two parts—one for this week and one for next week.

“Augustine believed that ‘no one can walk without a guide.’ Scripture and history prove that this is more than a sentiment; it is truth.

Christian faith is imitative—it is taught by one person to another. Jesus set the pattern when He said to a small band of men, ‘Follow Me.’ Christ spoke often to the multitudes, but the intense forming of lives occurred in daily conversation with His disciples. In that community, these men themselves became disciple-makers and thereby carried on the work of building the kingdom…


Much of mentoring involves the process of listening to and observing the life of others and teaching them to see where God is already at work in and around them. Good listening is a must, as well as the ability to draw out of their hearts whatever is lodged there. As with all ministry, it is important to understand that mentoring does not come in a one-size-fits-all format. Mentoring will be as unique as the persons involved. However, observable patterns can help in understanding the types of mentors and what each brings to the relationship:

Discipler—empowerment to follow Christ

Spiritual guide—accountability for the practice of spiritual disciplines and spiritual growth

Coach—skill development for ministry and motivation to use those skills

Counselor—advice and perspective for viewing life and ministry

Teacher—knowledge and motivation to act on it

Sponsor—career guidance for emerging leaders

Contemporary model—a personal model for life and ministry

Historical model—principles and values from leaders of the past

Divine contact—guidance and/or discernment coinciding with apparent divine intervention

Regardless of what personality the mentoring relationship takes on, three basic questions must be deliberated: Who is God? Who am I? What am I to do with my life? These embody the universal soul-quest of mankind, and the pursuit of the answers will shape a life.”

The women who have asked to be a part of the mentoring ministry are obviously seeking help and encouragement in their lives and relationship with God. They are probably hoping for someone who can “show them the way to do it.” In reality, there is no short cut or easy way through the process of Christ’s “Follow Me.” The apostle Paul was not boasting or proud when he said, “And you should follow my example, just as I follow Christ’s.” –1 Cor. 11:1 (NLT) The best thing we can do as mentors is to be imitators of Christ in order that our lives are transformed into a life that might also be imitated.